Intergenerational Relationships

Hey All,

First and foremost I wish to express my deepest and greatest apologies for not contributing to this blog for a while, it seems that I had more confidence in my 'natural' technological competence which proved undeserved, as I have been working with Adobe Flash, and it has proven to have been the biggest thorn in my side, how hard can it be to create a button? apparently,very. Though I have gone through the difficult process of trying to understand it, and now I feel I am able to create something relatively decent, given the time and the voice to shout at the computer when it is doing silly things. But I digress.

I want to mainly concentrate on the importance of Intergenerational Relationships within the Queer community (or the LGBT for community for those who dislike the term 'Queer'). Before vulgar images spring immediately to mind, I do not mean sexual relationships (do not misunderstand, I am not trying being detrimental towards Intergenerational sexual relationships, this is just not the focus of this particular topic) rather, I wish to concentrate on the convivial interactions between the different generations of the LGBT Queer community.

The nature of Intergenerational interactions within the LGBTQ community was brought to my attention through a couple of interviews I was conducting with people who have 1 or 2 generations proceeding them. From what I can gather, there is a rising concern in the loss of 'information' and familial support in a non-heteronormative family network one supposedly has in a straight family with regards to all aspects of their life, assuming that most 'straight' families speaking straightly at each other about straight things.

I am intrigued by this claim, it basically suggests that there are few interactions within the queer community to count as 'intergenerational interaction' and that 'we' tend not to affiliate with other generations for various reasons. This could perhaps be because a certain generation are widely cast as 'homophobic', therefore making it seem difficult to become more 'open' with people from an older generation. Perhaps some avoidance is taken proactively to avoid assumptions from the watchful eyes of the surrounding public who instinctively tut at sight of seeing any younger person in the same company as an older person in a non-family/employer situation. I recall tutting at the idea of this being true initially when I heard this theory, in my head it couldn't possibly be true because I knew... well there is uh... there's definitely that guy... ... .

I had to realise that I actually did not interact with a member of the queer community, or do not consider any much older (OR much younger) other than my own family of origin as 'kin', and unfortunately for them, they are straight (I hope the full force of my sarcasm or irony was made clear with the joke, I may have to append if it proves too heterosexist). We are living in an age now where our family of origin are 'vertical' in that there are several generations within them, but very few people within each generation, this family dynamic makes it quite improbable to have a 'biological' queer connection in an alternative generation. As i looked back, I realised that apart from this project, I had very few interactions with any other generational levels in my social network. My initial, internal snorts of derision had to be reconsidered.

Of course I am speaking as one person, who has had one set of life experience. I am also speaking as one person who is aware of the reservations of several other people from the queer community to integrate with other generations for fear of said assumptions. Social and familial cohesion proves to be have an incredible amount of significance in terms of feelings of support and stability and this can be affected and distorted through differences in 'status' within the family, this becomes more problematic, it seams, when it comes to your sexuality. This can be quite worrying as we (as humans) are quite reliant on this support system. One of the keywords I have identified has been 'information', in that the majority of the participants in my study had felt their queer kinship network had given them practical knowledge such as "where are the best gay clubs here?", "I just broke up with my Boy/Girl-friend, What do I do?" etc.... and representative information, they provided a model of some description (be it good or bad) for the person in question to base their life experience from. I think this is an incredible thing to have. now. as someone who doesn't have immediate access to a queer kinship network. How do I go about getting one? I hear all 8 of you cry.

I feel we can get this information, this cohesion, through general interactions with older/younger generations of the queer community, without searching for that 'familial' bond (even though that would be an incredible bonus I guess). My personal perspective (which I would gladly say does not derive from any particular academic research) would be that the more you come into contact with diversity, you yourself become diverse (diverse also being a synonym for awesome), In a more professional tone, the less you pigeonhole yourself, the more you are able to interact and work within different social circuits, thus creating more opportunities to learn and develop.

In terms of this particular subject, this could be actively searching communities in the area that serve as facilitators for these kinds of interactions for example the GEM soc, Allsorts and PFLAG to name a few. Also perhaps find out more about the 'AGE project being led by the ILGA-Europe / IGLYO which is quite an incredible initiative. If you want to read what they have to to say check out the bottom of this post for the reference.

I can't say how this is possible on a day to day basis, as Dyer has identified, the invisibility of the LGBTQ community makes it difficult to address this issue. Though I do think it is an important thing to keep in mind when going about your day to day life. I know looking back during the period where I was re-conciliating my sexuality I would have appreciated someone being there to answer my questions (other than the internet) and I still like the idea of exchanging stories with others as a form of learning. Humans are a story telling species, we have been doing since the dawn of time, perhaps think about hearing someone else's or sharing yours.

PROGRESS REPORT:
I am nearing the end of my interview collection. I just need to code them now, I have done 6 so far and my flash installation is... going. I hope this proves sufficient enough material!

Until next we speak.

(ILGA: Paulick, S. (2008). Joint ILGA-Europe / IGLYO - Age Project - Intergenerational Dialogue with(in) the LGBT Community. ILGA Europe.)

Pink Paper

LOOK ->

Pink Paper

Press! I just had someone call me because of this coverage.

I will post a bigger and better post soon.

Thanks for putting up with me!

Progress Report

Hey All,

This is going to be a quick report about where we are in the stages of this project:

I have gathered 5 interviews (one of which became corrupt), so I have a grand total of 4, legitimate interviews.

I have started designing the Flash installation (which will hopefully look spectacularly professional, however, because it is me. we will have to hold our breaths)

I have 4 potential interviews gathered by pride (again if all goes to plan) which means more stories. which is always good.

I have been in contact with several other communities within Brighton and now extending my arms out to London.

I have produced 5 pages of academic texts which pertains to this subject area (if any of you are interested, let me know and I shall recommend some books/journals) and I have about 2 pages dealing with media representations (which I don't think is good enough!)

Just a quick update, I will be back with more words later, when I have actually achieved something that I would call productive. Until then.

Vulnerability: is it our weakness or strength?

Hey all,

In this post, I would like to think about vulnerability, especially with regards to the LBGTIQ community being considered a community that has been portrayed, throughout the media, and adheres to the idea that it is essentially a group that is 'vulnerable'. But first, the context.

As I was doing my usual - i.e. sending e-mails off to people who are actually important, and have real life responsibilities other than to humour an undergraduate doing a project - I encountered a very interesting person who, levied a rather interesting question:

"why are you seeking to protect anonymity? Does this not imply that the 'group' you are researching is vulnerable, disempowered and needs protection?"

Throughout all my e-mails and interactions with people regarding the project, I have always hastened to reassure them of their anonymity, chucking words like 'pseudonyms' at them and using phrases like 'your identity will be hidden', 'no one will know' etc... as if they have a disease that no one wishes to make a public claim to have, and i'm exposing their story whilst keeping them under the shroud of normality. In retrospect, I understand this interpretation to be a little hyperbolic, but the issue remains the same. Should we consider members of the LGBTIQ community vulnerable?

I remember my original answer to this was a little staggered, fumbly and unkempt. So i'm going to try and readdress the question with a little more coherence and less spelling errors. As I am a very busy being important (I.e. I have to dedicate time to twitter and facebook, these are both very busying and important social practices!) I will spare you the essay length response (this has nothing to do with the fact that It is a Saturday and I'm currently Inside watching it be sunny outside).

Firstly, I feel it is important to address why there is this conception that the LGBTIQ community and all of its affiliates are vulnerable. There have been countless studies, such as Ryan & Rivers (2003) who investigated the instances of depression, anxieties, lack of self-esteem issues, and often violent retributions and suicidal attempts as a result of the societal pressures to stay as close to the hegemonic norms as possible. Rivers suggested these insecurities are fortified within us in our youth (2002) suggesting people who come out have to "consider how their choices will impact on the quality of their lives, those of their friends, and indeed, those of their friends". Which, I would suggest, would be the first instance of registering the epistemological response to anything that counters the normative values of society. Sparing the details, these values are reaffirmed at the home (see, Hines & Malley-Morrison, 2005), at school (see, Plummer, 1999) and perhaps mostly through media (see, Nardi & Bolton, 1998)) Through recycling stereotypical representations of homosexuality, or portraying stories of LGBTIQ oriented people having to battle through all odds and seekacceptance from a group of people who have the power to bestow upon them the honour of standing them on a less than equal slope all because they conform more directly the hetereonormative values that are dominant in our contemporary society.

So, there is cause to reason why there may be some onus on the idea that there may be some who feel vulnerable when there are unsympathetic stories circulating of yet another Gay-Bashing incident, or acts of discrimination happening left right and centre. HOWEVER (and this is a big however) for fear of contributing to the existing media that should make people more paranoid about leaving their own homes. Given the current advances in LGBTQ rights globally (GO ARGENTINA) and locally (Muslim, Gay and HAPPY!, No need to ask or tell, Gay Adoption etc...) and there is an increasing amount of representations of LGBTQ identified members of the community in Mainstream media. These examples would lead us all to think that the LGBTIQ voice has become so awesomely powerful, by automatically assuming people would want to take cover and to hide their anonymity in a research project like this would surely reaffirm the negative press mentioned earlier surrounding the community.

I concluded, that by offering people the shelter of anonymity, especially those who have had first hand experience with homophobic actions, I am not just going to get people who are well adjusted, who probably have had very positive experiences whilst coming out, and see no traumas in their immediate world. I am also more likely going to have individuals who have had negative experiences actively come to me and offer their stories to share, to contribute to the diverse and varied array of experiences that each individual has come across within the community. After all, each and every life is different. So I guess I am saying it is not that the LGBTIQ community that is vulnerable purse, people are.

Thanks for wading through that, I am going to post a progress report soon (possibly now?) so watch this space!

Queer Family Titles

Hey all,

Part of this research project entails me clumsily wading through 'media' (which is a big concept), finding examples of LGBTIQ people with LGBTIQ families (comparably, a very small, teeny, tiny, minute fraction of the whole media-scape). Unfortunately, there aren't any blogs already out there that I can find doing my job. I feel that I should therefore summon all the will power I can muster and contribute to the growing list that I have created at the moment. It's a little light at the moment, because of its general difficulty I felt the need to shy away into the dark recesses of the library and buried my head in academic books, journals and whatnot because they are organised and tell me things I need to know and where to get more information to satisfy my incurable thirst for everything queer theory.

Without further ado, my list:
(WARNING: some of the representations of queer genealogies may not be positive and good, I am merely stating that they exist, and it is up to you (the active reader) to figure out for yourselves whether or not you agree with the conceptions of queer families within these media artefacts)
(DOUBLE WARNING: I tend to use parenthetical interjections too frequently, if it offends you, cover your eyes and have someone read this to you (because this is important!))

Almodóvar, P. (Writer), & Almodóvar, P. (Director). (1987). Law of Desire [Motion Picture].

Andreas, C. (Director). (2008). Between Love & Goodbye [Motion Picture].

Arnold, J. (1996). Amy Asks a Question: Grandma, What's a Lesbian? Mother Courage Press.

Baitz, J. R. (Creator). (2006-). Brothers and Sisters [Television Drama].

Bechdel, A. (2007). Fun Home. New York: First Mariner Books.

Chaffetz, J. (2003). Gay Reality. Lincoln: iUniverse inc.

cturtlevirtue. (2007, March 31). ~~Family Family (squared)~~. Retrieved Jul 19, 2010, from Youtube:

Gaylord, G. (Director). (2009). Eating Out [Motion Picture].

Hale, C. (Director). (2008). Mulligans [Motion Picture].

Heron, A., & Meredith, M. (1994). How Would You Feel If Your Dad Was Gay? Alyson Publications.

Hochner, Y. (Director). (2008). Antarctica [Motion Picture].

Johnson, T. (2008). Family Outing: What Happened When I found Out My Mother Was Gay. Arcade Publishing.

Klein, F., & Schwartz, T. (2001). Bisexual and Gay Husbands: Their Stories, Their Words. Binghamton: Harrington Park Press.

Lizzythelezzy. (2009, Jan 14). GAY & LESBIAN SIBLINGS! Stand up Comedy videos by LIZZY THE LEZZY . Retrieved Jul 19, 2010, from Youtube:

Martineau, J., & Ducastel, O. (Directors). (2005). Cote D'azur [Motion Picture].

Munch, C. (Director). (2004). Harry & Max Brothers: Brothers Like No Others [Motion Picture].

Osbourne, G. (Director). (2007). An Angel Named Billy [Motion Picture].

Rowe, M. (2007). Other Men's Sons. Commorant Books.

Tafdrup, C. (Director). (2008). Awakening [Motion Picture].

TheMichaelMullen. (2010, Jul 19). Fruit and Fly #8: "Mom, We're Gay!". Retrieved May 13, 2008, from

Tucker, D. (Director). (2006). Transamerica [Motion Picture].

Vincent, P.-A. (Director). (2008). Give Me Your Hand [Motion Picture]. France.

Wagner, P., & Wagner, H. (2009). Ready or Not... They're Gay: Stories from a Midwestern Family. Austin: Synergy Books.

I'm doing this because I want to keep you guys informed on progress on the research project. However I'm primarily doing this to show the kinds of representations that do exist in the mediascape of queer intergenerational families. From the get go, it doesn't look promising to be honest, there is one i have cut out from the major list Uncle David for example, which examines the incestuous relationship that develops between a gay man (and former porn star) and his aged uncle. It's a telling story no less, but it exemplifies the exploration of queer families through sexual encounters and hyper-sexing and this seem to be quite prevalent in this particular corner of the mediasphere. I have found that most media forms deal with these non-traditional families through incest and the problems that arise there (go look at Harry & Max, and Give Me Your Hand to name a couple). I'm finding it increasingly difficult to find positive images of the kind of families I'm looking for, Brother's ad Sisters was a good, positive example in my eyes because throughout the seasons, it delves into everyone's lives and their personalities as well as their token attributes that makes the family

unique

.

I guess I'm saying that media and internet should sort themselves out more! (though this is at the preliminary stages of my research, I may have to eat my words). MAKE ME EAT MY WORDS INTERNET I dare you.

I hope you enjoyed this ramble,
Until later.

It continues...

Hi to all,

Success, i have collected my first interview, and it proves to be quite an interesting story. However, because of the very nature of this project, the anonymity of the participant is my priority. But this proves to be exciting news as I now have tangible, code-able legitimate research material. Good.

Also, watch this space, because this project may get a mention on Gscene (a Brighton Gay Magazine) and Brighton Rag (an alternative gay magazine in brighton) which will be cool, hopefully this will attract some more interested participants.

Speaking of which, I feel the need to clarify the fact that I don't see the people who wish to take part in this study as mere 'participants', it is necessary, for me at least to recognise the fact these are people, with real lives and with real stories to tell! I am genuinely interested in seeing how gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender etc... people, who have grown up and developed in family which have representations of counter-heteronormativity in their family structure, understand their sexuality, or more importantly, how they grew to understand their sexuality. As child from a relatively conventional upbringing (in the sense that everyone was/considers themselves to be straight, bearing mind that my family are equally as dysfunctional in a plethora of other ways) it is interesting to consider that for some, there was never a 'coming out story' with regards to their family. Or to argue the opposite, there was even more pressure to stay hidden/straight/'normal, because of the fear the family would have for their offspring, the knowledge that life would be that little bit harder for them, and the added fear of (ignorant) people blaming them for their child's (sp? I don't know whether homosexuality is a noun, which can be owned, please enlighten me) homosexuality.

I fear this is turning into an unguided ramble, I shall keep you posted, all three of you, and let you know how this research is progessing.

The Process

Hey all,

As I may or may not have mentioned earlier, building up the necessary levels of energy for me to update this blog is to a large extent, quite taxing. However, I will not deprave you, dear reader who ever you are, of my research misadventures, blunders and successes. Without further ado:

The project officially started on the 05 July, and I'm currently on day 7 of my project and so far, I might say, so good. I have spent a lot of time getting to know the whole of Brighton, frantically waving my recruitment flyers and posters to every pub/bar/bookshop/hairdressers/group I can get a hold of. I am completely sure that i'm not the only bright eyed bouncy student they've seen claiming that their research is incredibly important to the society at large and therefore I almost as sure I was going to be met with a barrage of negative critiques or worse still. Nothing. However, I could not have been more wrong if I say so myself, every pub/bar/bookshop/hairdressers etc... greeted me with smiles and questions which A) was thoroughly delightful and B) rather threw me off. You see I imagined that I would be hand signalled to the nearest poster/flyer spot after regurgitating my research abstract in broken 'plain english', and then be asked to leave. I did not imagine that I would be met with inquisitive and thought provoking questions by the general public - who may have more important things to do than to entertain an undergrad student with his musings on Queer theory. Anyway I thought I might put up some of the said questions at the end of this blog and maybe open the panel for you to offer your opinion or correct, expand, contribute, rebut, your thoughts about the topic at hand (preferably, refraining from petty insults).

Officially I have not done any 'real' interviews, barring a pilot interview with my supervisor Kate O'Riordan which I feel went well (in that I didn't go down like a fiery zeppelin) and i've organised a few interviews which is exciting. And i've been updating a growing resource list for journals and the like that have some relevance to this research. In actual fact, I've found that Kate Weston's book "Families we choose: Lesbians, Gays, Kinship" and Jeffrey Weeks' "Same Sex Intmacies" are proving to be quite interesting reads. These articles deal with finding ways to challenge our conventional ideas surrounding families- i.e. the need for there to be a biological connection and the need for there to be a female and male presence in the immediate family - which resolves several tensions that surrounds queer kinship and in doing so, questions the concept of 'family' by exploring “the ways they live their lives, and discourses and ideologies of how they should live their lives” with regards to the heteronormative standards that have been put in place in society (Gittens 1993). Through the initial stages of research I have found that for some, the 'chosen family', requires more attention, the word 'nourish' appears - and people's biological kin are often considered a stable pillar of support. I'm not sure if I agree with Weeks on this point, however, alot of what his work goes through seems to make sense. Let me know what you think of it all.

As promised, questions:
Do you think that the term 'Queer' has softened and perhaps undermined the work of those who took part in the LGBT rights campaigns in the 1970s or is their power in its ambiguity?

What do you consider to be family? especially with the LGBTQ community in mind?

What difference does it make having LGBTIQ family for your own identity? (for this particular question I would like to suggest this article which is quite positive and therefore makes me happy: Raising Children in an Age of Diversity - Advantages of Having a Lesbian Mother

Enough from me, now to pester more people about this project!